Friday, January 17, 2014

Unleash Your Inner Hoarder

By 

Hoarding doesn't apply to just those people you see on TV that may have sadly lost a few pets in their piles of junk. We all have a mild case of hoarding in some form or other.
It could be in the form of physical things like a vast collection souvenir matchbooks, piles of books you will never "get to", VHS taps with no actual VHS player, or a garage or kitchen full of duplicate tools. Your hoard can be more mental in not letting go of relationships you have outgrown or relationships that are negatively affecting you. You may have a stash of really nice wedding gifts of linen and china that never gets enjoyed because you are waiting to use for that "special occasion". Whatever it is there is something you are holding onto.
Maybe we still have this mentality to hoard from the harsh times in history - to survive a famine or the Great Depression.
Maybe it is the never-ending marketing ads that encourage us to buy anything and everything and prey on our insecurities. Ads bombard us constantly on the internet, TV, junk mail, and even our neighbors flaunting or bragging.
Maybe your 'stuff' is covering up something deeper. Are you holding onto your college football uniform because that was the last time you felt appreciated and important - even though it hasn't fit in 20 years? Are you hanging around the same negative friends because it is comfortable and you are afraid of their backlash if you try to improve your situation? Do you keep stacks and stacks of mail and junk all over your kitchen counters so you have an excuse not to invite friends over? Do you head to the mall when you feel stressed by an argument with your spouse? Are stacks of gourmet cookbooks collecting dust and making you feel like an inferior chef?
Could be that we feel the need to fill up any open space? There is an ancient teaching that states that the universe abhors a vacuum. When you let go of the old, the universe will send you new energy, ideas, situations, and opportunities. We need to start getting comfortable with the open space around us and not try to clutter it up with things or stuff down our feelings by purchasing items we don't need.
You should be investing your daily energy into the pursuits that have meaning for you - not your peers or what your family things you should do. And, remember that as you proceed on through life there are people, places, activities and ideas that you outgrow. Gracefully, let them go so you can allow the universe to direct new opportunities and people to you.
Whew! Those were some deep concepts to think about.
Now, here are some practical tips to unleashing your inner hoarder:
1. Beware of Bins! Before you get inspired to finally get organized and run out to purchase all kinds of baskets and bins. Stop! There is a definitely a problem with our society and our level of consumption when there is a whole store devoted to just containing stuff that we purchased from other stores. First, let's try to get rid of as much as possible. The containers and organizing gadgets and products often become the clutter themselves and an excuse to keep items that are no longer serving you. Just because everything is neatly organized and labeled doesn't mean you need to continue to take up precious real estate in your home to store the items, take the time out your short life to continue to regularly take care of these items, spending even more money on bins to contain the items, or using up any more of your energy to keep track of what you have and looking for things.
2. Replace your Ritual. I often work with people trying to break old bad habits or start new good habits. Most times my client doesn't even really necessarily enjoy the bad habit anymore, it is the ritual surrounding the bad habit. For example, if a client wants to stop the bad habit of wasting time going to happy hour and gossiping with co-workers, we need to replace that with a ritual that is counter-intuitive. So, I would suggest the client pick a hobby or activity that they have always wanted to try but "didn't have the time for". By starting the new hobby activity after work they still have the ritual of going out to unwind after their work day but it is for a positive pastime. They will also start surrounding themselves automatically with new positive people that enjoy this same activity and probably not the gossiping and over consumption at happy hour.
3. Nobody cares. Let me explain, I always tell my clients "Why are you keeping this item just to impress someone - nobody cares that you have this." But Agnes Repplier, an American essayist, puts this idea a little more eloquently... "The pleasure of possession whether we possess trinkets or off-spring-or possibly books or chessmen, or postage stamps-lies in showing these things to friends, who are experiencing no immediate urge to look at them."
So you have the worlds best literary works lining your shelves that you've never really read but they make you feel like a superior intellectual. Or, you have 10 boxes of holiday decorations that you have to drag out every year, spend hours putting them all around the house and then take another whole day to take them down. Maybe it takes so much time that now you don't even take them out at all. All I am saying is that when you have these things... make sure you have them for you and you get joy out of them. We don't want to give things space in our homes or energy if it is purely for others to envy. Remember that everyone else is consumed about their own lives - not what you have.
4. Stop clutter at the source. Once we de-clutter and organize the small amount of items we are keeping, we then need to stop future clutter from invading our space. Take a look at the patterns of your past and present that may contribute to the clutter. An example, of this is if you have a fight with your spouse about debt and then ironically escape to the mall for some mindless shopping that could add even more debt to the situation. Try to be aware and catch yourself in the car driving to the mall and then turn the car in the direction of the gym to run off some of this frustration. Or, maybe you don't have a system set up for the mail and papers that creep into your home everyday so it ends up all over the counter causing you to feel stress and race around shoving all the paper in a drawer when an unexpected friend shows up on your doorstep for coffee. Instead of graciously welcoming your friend you act busy and uninterested. Take care of the little things everyday and your clutter control will become a habit.
In conclusion, all the "stuff" is just a symptom for something deeper going on in at all levels from those advanced cases of extreme hoarders down to the average woman with a full closet and "nothing to wear". When I work with my clients they discover that by letting go of physical things, they start letting go of ideas, activities, and people that no longer honor their desired lifestyle. Although silly, maybe clearing their overflowing closet or file cabinet was the portal to growth.
Erica Duran is a Productivity Expert and Certified Professional Organizer (CPO®). At Erica Duran International, she provides both virtual and in-person coaching around the globe through her programs, courses, and products. Erica mostly attracts women entrepreneurs and small business owners who want results fast! She helps them to clear the clutter in their lives at ALL levels, gets them out of just being "busy" and "overwhelmed" and into a calm, flowing, profitable and balanced lifestyle.
Learn more and claim your FREE gifts at http://www.EricaDuran.Co

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