Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Backsliding - Regression To Disorganization

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Once a client makes the decision to start the "organizing process" they have taken the first step towards a more organized life. Most clients don't really understand that being "organized" is a way of life. For some of us it seems to come naturally. For others it is a learned experience. And for some, it is an unattainable goal.
I tell my clients, over and over again, "being organized is a process..... and once I leave your home after de-cluttering and organizing your space.... it is a process that must be continued and a process that takes time to become your own".
Some clients get it.....some don't. "Backsliding is a client's regression to a previous disorganized state" (from the NSGCD).
For some organizers and me included it is almost like a failure on our part. We helped the client organize their home....we showed them how.... we explained what we were doing and why.... and still...the next time we visit the client the place is back to the way it was before we got there...or worse.
Some of the things that I have run across were clients that bought everything....except what I told them to buy, postponed appointments, cancelled appointments, the rooms being back in worse shape than when I left, organizing things in a way other than what I told them to....
Organizers don't always have to "have their own way"....but they are there for a reason and there is a "method" to what they are doing. Buying all of the great organizing gadgets that you see at the store....doesn't make you organized. Only "you" can make yourself organized. So why spend the money?
I try to re-purpose things that the client already has in the home first.....then we might bring in other organizing products. Rushing out to buy products is not the answer. With backsliding...which is a "normal" client behavior...they might feel bad about how they let the room get back to the "pre-organizer" state.... and then never call you again. It happens to a lot of organizers. But there is no need for the client to be embarrassed. We've seen it all....really we have...and as bad as you think your home might be....we're probably seen worse.
So... don't beat yourself up over it and jump back into the process.
Backsliding costs you money. By canceling your appointments and putting them off... you will probably be in a worse state than when you originally called the professional organizer. They will have to spend time getting back to where they left off...and then continuing the organizing process. So instead of spending three hours at your house it will take four or five hours.
Life can get in the way of your "organizing" sessions. Some people tend to think of their organizer as a "luxury" instead of an "investment in themselves". By having an organized home and life they can save time and money. And they will also feel less stressed and embarrassed by their surroundings. Less Clutter = Less Stress SM
Member: National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO)
Member: National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (NSGCD)
Certificate of Study in Chronic Disorganization
NAPO, Quantum Leap Trainer
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More Efficient Use of Your Space

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A lot of my clients say "I don't have enough storage space". And I say to them "yes, you do, you just aren't utilitizing your space efficiently".
Another problem is not the "space" but the "stuff". "Too much stuff". How much stuff can one person or one family use? The first phase of "finding enough space" is de-cluttering. That means going through all of your stuff and getting rid of things that you no longer use, wear or need. Then there are the things that are broken or too small. Purge these things out of your life. You have already created more "space".
Now look at your closets. Most closets are designed with only one rod across the top. Very inefficient. By adding another rod you have doubled your space without doubling the size of the closet. For your closets or pantries that have shelves you can add more space by adding shelf dividers. Again, you have just doubled your space. If your closets have movable shelves you can change the height of the shelves depending on what you are storing on the shelves. This would also allow you to add more shelves for smaller items.
Under the bed storage is a great way to make use of seldom used space. There are great containers that have wheels that are easy to slide under the bed. You can store extra blankets, sweaters, shoes or any number of things.
Put shelves on walls and make use of wall space. A great idea for books or displaying collectibles so that they don't take up floor or counter space. Make use of those "nooks and crannies". If you really looked you could find all types of small or thin shelving units that can be placed in between things.
Use decorative boxes that can sit out and double as storage. There are lots of ways to add extra "space" to a small room. You just have to let your imagination run wild and "think outside the box".
Remember... LESS CLUTTER = LESS STRESS (sm)
Member: National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO);
Member: National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (NSGCD)
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Organizing For Seniors

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Organizing is not as straight forward as people might think. "Just get rid of stuff. Just move things around" some people would say. Yes, that might be part of the organizing process but it does not take into account the special needs of each client.
Organizing for various age groups and people with varying degrees of capabilities requires special considerations.
As people age they might not have the strength to do the job themselves. They might get tired more easily. They might not be able to bend or lift things like people that are a lot younger. This also applies to people with varying health issues... but for this session we want to talk about the special considerations that you might want to make when you are organizing with people that are a bit older.
If you are helping your parents or relatives that are over 60 you might want to take a step back and realize that they have different levels of energy, different ideas of what they want to let go of, different ideas on a lot of things.
As a non-professional organizer you might not think about all of the issues that they are facing but rather think about your own desire to just help them. This is a normal mistake that a lot (if not most) people make.
The first step that might help you is to just take a step back yourself and ask yourself "how would you feel if someone came into your home and just started throwing all of your prized possessions and memories out?". I am sure that the answer would be "not good". So put yourself into their place, take a step back and think about them and what they want and need as you help them. Don't make this about you.
Some issues that you might have to deal with when organizing for seniors are:
Memory issues - they can't remember where they put things. Because of this they might have gotten into the habit of leaving everything out in the open (therefore causing a cluttered house) so that they can see it.
They constantly buy more and more (food or clothes... or whatever) because they forgot they already have it.
Physical issues - they don't have the strength or stamina to clean up after themselves so they don't. Again, this is one possible cause of their cluttered home.
Mental issues - they no longer care about their home because they have lost a loved one and are depressed. Their friends are all dying and they have no social interaction.
All of the above are just some of the reasons that seniors might have more issues with clutter.
But clutter itself can also cause physical problems in that it creates a dangerous situation in their home with them tripping over the clutter and causing physical harm to themselves.
When working with seniors be sure to limit the amount of time for each organizing session. Make sure that they get plenty of breaks and snacks to keep their energy up.
So as you see... organizing isn't just a straight forward project. It is a complex process that is different in every situation.
Organizational Consulting Services
Member: National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO);
Member: National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (NSGCD);
Certificate of Study in Chronic Disorganization;
Certificate of Study in Basic Hoarding Issues With the CD Client;
Certificate of Study in Understanding the Needs of the Elderly CD Client;
Certificate of Study in Basic ADD Issues with the CD Client;
Certificate of Study in CD Client Administration;
CD Specialist - Level II Certificate;
NAPO, Quantum Leap Trainer;
NAPO in the Schools Trained Provider
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What is an Organizing Coach?

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When I tell people that I'm an organizing coach, I often get a puzzled look. Then I get the questions. What is that? How can you possibly help someone get organized if you aren't in their home? Well, the truth is that coaching can be an extremely effective. And it's less expensive than getting organized with a hands-on organizer.
You can learn a lot from reading organizing books, but it's still not easy to figure out how what you learn actually applies to your life and situation. It's not easy to see yourself, your stuff and your life objectively. Coaching helps you see your life - and your stuff - in a whole new way. With a caring coach to guide you and ask the questions that help you make decisions, you can get the results you seek much faster than when left to chance. Working with an organizing coach helps you understand and prioritize your organizing needs, stay focused, learn new skills, and change the habits that caused disorganization.
What an Organizing Coach Does
An effective organizing coach is someone who helps you:
  • Understand what is causing your situation
  • Develop a compelling vision of how organizing will change your life
  • Create a master plan, chunk out your organizing projects, and decide where to start
  • Identify create solutions to your needs, and determine how to get the job done so it doesn't overwhelm you
  • Get over procrastination and stay focused on your vision of a better life
  • Release the negative self-talk that is holding you back
  • Overcome obstacles one by one so you can simplify, organize and energize your life.
Your coach should be someone who is entirely on your side, won't judge you, and provides a fresh perspective to help you let go of mental, emotional and physical clutter. Using a process that is a combination of deep listening, questioning, guiding, sharing, teaching, problem-solving, celebrating & cheerleading, a good coach will help you stay focused on your vision, build confidence in your yourself, develop skills, and stay motivated to take action so you can achieve your vision.
A Good Coach:
  • Listens - Deep listening allows you to get to the heart of the matter quickly
  • Questions - Asking the right questions helps you honor your inner wisdom
  • Shares - Sharing information and skills helps you feel empowered and confident
  • Celebrates - Celebrating accomplishments energizes and propels you to move forward!
Why do People Seek Out an Organizing Coach? People seek coaching for a variety of reasons. You may have:
  • Changed your life in a big way such as going back to school, changing careers, getting married, having a child, or moving
  • An ongoing problem that has escalated to a level of pain you can no longer tolerate
  • Experienced an unplanned life transition or event that has shaken up your life and caused chaos
Or you may just want to make your life easier, simpler, and better! Some of my coaching clients include people who have:
  • Recently moved and are having difficulty getting unpacked and settled in. The chaos is draining them so badly that they just can't seem to make progress.
  • Gotten married and need to merge their stuff but their spouse has a different style.
  • Had a child or a second or third that has left them feeling overwhelmed.
  • Kids with special needs they want to help organize.
  • Paper clutter that was bad has gotten worse. They've different approaches but they just aren't working. They need a SIMPLE solution to conquering paper for once and for all!
  • A job they hate or recently lost a job and want to discover their true passion and decide on a meaningful direction for their life.
  • Trouble being on time. Their boss has told them that lateness and disorganization is affecting their performance and they won't get a raise or be considered for a promotion.
  • A hard time letting go of things and now that they are getting older, the stuff is starting to suffocate them. Their habits of keeping things are so ingrained they get overwhelmed when they try to let go alone.
If your quality of life is going downhill because you have clutter that is distracting you, wasting your time and keeping you from doing the things you love, you need to make room for new and better opportunities. When you are ready to get it together and get organized so you can get what you want out of life, a coach can help you make your goals a reality. Whatever your situation, if you are ready for a change, and willing to take time out to take focused action to make your dreams a reality, coaching may be just what you need.
© 2006 Ariane Benefit
Get fresh ideas for simplifying life at http://www.arianebenefit.com. Ariane Benefit, M.S.Ed. is a Life Design Coach, speaker and author with over 25 years experience working with Fortune 500 businesses, non-profits, purpose-driven self-employed professionals and passionate individuals to uplevel their performance, heal chronic disorganization, clutter and overwhelm, and to design more function, flow and fulfillment into life and work. She has appeared on NPR and been quoted in Psychology Today, the Wall Street Journal, New York Newsday, and more.
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How to Detach From Your Clutter So You Can Let it Go!

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"The surest way to detach from one outcome is to reattach yourself to a more empowering outcome: serving others, replacing a bad habit with a good one, or focusing on the present." - Stephen Shapiro, Goal-Free Living
This is true with decluttering as well. It is much easier to let go, when you have a clear vision of what you want in it's place. Clutter is often a result of being stuck in or unable to let of the past. It could be emotional, or just not taking the time to clear out stuff you don't need.T o help you emotionally detach from your stuff, so you can let it go, it helps to focus on
  • The empowering present and future results you will achieve
  • How having less clutter will serve you and make your life better
  • Keeping only the treasures and things you really need in the "present".
Here are some examples of the positive outcomes you gain from clearing clutter:
  • A better family life with less fighting and stress
  • More time to spend on things and people you really love
  • Improved relationships
  • Able to invite people to your home or office without embarrassment
  • More energy (clutter actually physically drains energy and can lead to depression)
  • More money (clutter usually results in buying duplicates of things you already have)
  • Higher self-esteem (you feel better about your self when you are in charge - not your stuff)
  • Less stress
  • You'll be able to find what you need when you need it
  • Better health (less stuff to collect dust & dirt)
  • It will be easier to clean your home
  • You will have less mental clutter so it will be easier to focus on your present and future goals and get things done!
To help you detach emotionally from sentimental items, try meditating on the following thoughts.
  • Things are NOT people! When you toss or recycle something someone gave you, like a card, a souvenir, or a toy, you are not throwing away the person. The same is true of duplicate photos. You aren't getting rid of the person when you get rid of the extra photos.
  • People don't expect you to keep everything they give you for the rest of your life. They give you things to make you happy, and if having too much stuff is making you unhappy, they surely would want you to pass the things on.
  • Keeping old clothing from an era in your life so you can remember it is a sentiment many of us share. I have a hard time with this too! But you can learn to let go of clothing too! One way is to take photos of them instead of keeping the clothes themselves. The thing about old clothing is that is needs to be cleaned regularly and stored properly or it will start to rot, turn yellow, attract moths and other bugs, collect dust mites and maybe even get moldy or mildewed. It also can be really bad for allergies. Why put yourself through this? Isn't it better to pass on clothing to someone who can use it rather than take your your time and energy or just letting it rot?
  • Often people want to pass things down to their kids. This can be a good thing, but many people hold on to way too much on behalf of their kids. I've seen whole basements full of "stuff my kinds might want in 25 years" Trust me, they won't want all their old baby clothes! Maybe a couple really cool games, but be choosy! Set space limits on how much you will keep. Give the rest to someone who can use your unneeded things now.
  • Often people are afraid they will miss things. To counteract this fear, remember, things can be replaced, but you can't make more time. And you can't easily make space in your home without letting excess, unused things go. And if you do miss something, it usually passes in a moment and there is no harm to you. You don't need that much to survive! If you find yourself missing an inanimate object so badly it interferes with your life, you should probably seek counseling to get at the root of the issue.
Letting go isn't easy, but if you stay focused on your present needs and priorities, and learn to view your things with less emotion, you will be much happier. Mastering the art of letting go of your stuff is a wonderful way to build your self-esteem, gain peace of mind and feel in control of your life!
Would you like to simplify your life and get more organized? Ariane Benefit is a Life Coach, ADD Coach, organizing expert, author and coach who has been quoted in Psychology Today, the Wall Street Journal, and more. Visit her popular Neat & Simple Living Blog at http://blog.neatandsimple.com Ariane has over 25 years experience helping businesses and individuals get the results they want. Take a peek inside her book, Neat & Simple Guide to Organizing Your Office at http://www.lotusbridge.com
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How to Organize and Display Kid's Art Work

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Every mom shares the same dilemma. What to do with all the wonderful art your child creates! Without strategies for display, organizing and editing, these delightful treasures will just pile up and become a burden of clutter. Here's my top 10 neat ideas on how to keep their art from becoming clutter.
  1. Set policies on how much you are going to keep. For example, you might decide you want to keep only the top 10 - 20 pieces per year.
  2. Edit regularly. Keep only the very best or most meaningful. Each day or week, pick your favorite. At the end of the month, pick the best of the month. That's the one that gets put in a scrapbook or in a special memorabilia box. Involve your child in selecting his or her favorite. This helps your child learn that not everything is worth keeping, which is a very valuable organizing skill to learn early on.
  3. Go digital! Take digital photos of art you really love and recycle the rest! This preserves the art much longer. Paper eventually fades and tatters.  
  4. Create an album or scrapbook for each school year and include photos of the best art along with other projects.
  5. Label the work. Mark the back of artwork you decide to save with the child name, date and the reason you kept it.
  6. Create a revolving gallery. Create a space on a wall or other area that becomes a revolving art gallery. Use magnetic boards, cork boards etc. Provide one spot for each child and hang their photo or a name marker above their spot. Each time to you change the art decide if the old piece is worth saving.  
  7. Repurpose and recycle. Find creative uses for art work you don't want to keep. Use it as:
    • Gift wrap
    • Inserts for greeting cards
    • Drawer/shelf liners  
    • Decorate containers to use as organizers for arts & crafts supplies
    • Creative disposal placements for a meal. Or, if it's really good, mount it to construction paper, laminate it, and use the art as place mats for a longer time.
  8. Get funky with clipboards. As an inexpensive and fun alternative to frames, use colorful clipboards mounted on the wall to create an art gallery for your child's room. Let them decide what they want to hang and when they want to change it. Clipboards allow them to easily change out art frequently.
  9. Draw the line. Hang a clothesline across a wall in an area where you want to display art and hang it with clothespins. This makes it easy to change the art whenever you or your child wants to!
  10. Make gifts.Create unique gifts for relatives with good pieces. You can make little books, puzzles, calendars, and more. Encourage your child to help think of ways to transform art into fun gifts.
© 2006 Ariane Benefit
Would you like to simplify your life and get more organized? Ariane Benefit is a Life Coach, ADD Coach, organizing expert, author and coach who has been quoted in Psychology Today, the Wall Street Journal, and more. Visit her popular Neat & Simple Living Blog at http://blog.neatandsimple.com Ariane has over 25 years experience helping businesses and individuals get the results they want. Take a peek inside her book, Neat & Simple Guide to Organizing Your Office at http://www.lotusbridge.com
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How to Organize Your Household Doodads & Hardware So You Can Find Anything!

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Everyone has those little miscellaneous things around the house you need but can't find when you need them. You know you have them "somewhere" but you always have to hunt all over the place looking for them.
Things like hooks, felt pads that stick under things to help them slide, rubber stops to keep things from sliding, twistie ties, batteries, lightbulbs, random nails and screws, various glues, tapes, and on and on. Sound familiar?
And how about all those extra doodads that come with things you buy? Like that new phone you bought. It has a doodad with it that allows you to hang it on the wall -- but you aren't hanging it on a wall. Or a new bookshelf that came with extra pegs so you could add another shelf if you like. Or perhaps your new cell phone has a belt clip with it that you never use. You know what I'm talking about.
Perhaps you thought you were the only one that had a hard time finding homes for these little clutter challenges. It turns out everyone (except maybe Martha Stewart) gets stumped by them. You can find these things scattered randomly in nearly every home. As an organizing consultant, I see them all the time. No one knows where to put them. Why? Because they seem to defy categorization. Here's how to give all of them a home.
Create a Hardware Store Area in your home. Many clutter challenges are solved by creating your own little "Home Depot" Hardware Store. I've created these in laundry areas, garages, basements, linen closets or any large area where it is convenient, but out of the way. You can give the area all sorts of names. Utility Closet, Supply Area, Gadget Department, whatever appeals to you.
Some homes have a utility area but still can't find what they need because it's a jumbled mess. The trick to making this space work for you is to treat it as a place where you will need to "find" things. Not as simply a place to "put" things.
In order to find things, you need to come up with some creative sub-categories to help you group all those little things you only have one or two of. Here are some of the categories I've come up with to sort things that defy easy categorization in the "Hardware Store".
  • Things that Hang Things - Group hooks, picture hanging kits, nails, screws and such in the same area. Sort like with like and put each type of thing in their own containers.
  • Things that Stick Things Together - Gather all your assorted glues, tapes, stick on magnets, twistie ties, velcro, and put them in the same area.
  • Things that Fix Little Problems - Here's where you put felt pads that stick under things to help them slide, rubber stops to keep things from sliding, the porcelain repair kit for the chip in the bathtub, etc.
  • "Spare Parts" Department - Today, every home needs a "Spare Parts" department to put all those little doodads you may need, but could not replace if you did need them. Like the hang-the-phone-on-the-wall thing. But, remember if you know you will never hang the phone on the wall, just toss it! There are many things people keep that should just be tossed. Like the extra screws from that new desk you put together. Out it goes. Be realistic about whether you will really ever use those spare parts and your life will be much simpler! Another key to making the Spare Parts Dept. work is to contain and label the parts so you, and everyone else you live with, knows what they go to.
This categorizing concept works for all the other little home supplies you have on hand, too. Electrical Supplies like extension cords should all be grouped together. Light Bulbs and all other lighting related things should be grouped. TV related cables and stuff, Stereo related cables and stuff, and so on.
But hold on. We aren't done yet. To make the whole system work there are three organizing principles you must apply to each of the departments you set up.
  1. Contain all the items. The containers don't have to be fancy or expensive. You can dig around in your recycle bin and find lots of great free containers. I've even been known to recycle sturdy shoeboxes, empty tissue boxes, strong tea boxes, and the plastic containers that eggs, tomatoes and premade salads come in. After all, there is no better recycling than repurposing all that packaging out there.
  2. Think Vertical wherever you can. Instead of stacking things on top of each other in a container, see if you can stand them up next to each other. This saves an amazing amount of space.
  3. Label Everything. If you label the areas, you and your family members are 80% more likely to put things back in their designated homes. And, most importantly you will be able to find what you need, when you need it, quickly.


TIPS FOR FAMILIES: As a way to get the whole family involved in using your new Hardware Store area, why not have a little fun with it? Let the kids help with the labeling and finding containers. Perhaps have a contest to creatively name the area, the categories within it, and choose the labels to put on things and give little prizes. The more involved they are in the process, the more successful your new system will be. And it's a great way to teach your kids organizing and categorizing skills that will last a lifetime.
There you have it. Once you get this hardware / supply / utility area set up and organized, you will find things all over your home that now can be given a proper home. Bit by bit, your clutter will transform into handy, useful items. You'll save time and money, so why not treat yourself to that pedicure or massage you've been wanting. You deserve it!
© 2006 Ariane Benefit
Would you like to simplify your life and get more organized? Ariane Benefit is a Life Coach, ADD Coach, organizing expert, author and coach who has been quoted in Psychology Today, the Wall Street Journal, and more. Visit her popular Neat & Simple Living Blog at http://blog.neatandsimple.com Ariane has over 25 years experience helping businesses and individuals get the results they want. Take a peek inside her book, Neat & Simple Guide to Organizing Your Office at http://www.lotusbridge.com
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